A doting father finds himself responsible not only for his baby, but also for the education of the child after the mother’s initiative. Charity begins at home, likewise education begins at home. So the father not only pays for the classroom education, but also inculcates the quality of responsibility in his baby. With his strictness he also instills discipline in his baby. Though in most homes the father is busy with his job till his retirement, he lends support to his wife in bringing up their baby during the non-office hours. The child looks up to him and knows that he is there when needed.
Vivaan, the 15 month old son of Atul Rai, finds his father beside him often despite the latter’s grueling office schedule in his man power consultancy company. He reveals, “I also support my wife in taking care of my kid. My son is just 15 months old. Every day I take him out and show him interesting objects. He is learning to speak now. Spending time with him is very crucial especially at this stage, when he is growing and learning new things every day.”
Atul finds that bonding with his son, “Boils down to spending time with him. By now I know what he likes and what he dislikes. He likes to listen to music. I play music for him. Spending more time helps develop the relationship and helps bond.”
Santosh Pal, bonds with his son, Shaurya, by communicating with him. He says, “I try to understand him. I see to it that there is good anger management for my child. As I am an architect, I travel a lot. But I see to it that I give my quality time to my child, rather than quantity time. I just don’t give what he wants but I explain to him what is important and what is urgent.”
Besides giving financial support for his child’s education, a father plays an active role in imparting knowledge to it. Atul says, “More than anything, education is not only about books. After he is back from school, we have to check with him on what he and his friends are doing and what his teacher told him. Even if you ask general things, it will help in his development.”
Santosh agrees that one need not keep educating through books only. According to him, “Learning can happen through computer, TV or any other kind of medium as well, the important thing is how the knowledge is presented to the child.”
Before marriage, a man, usually, goes out with his friends. Generally, home is not his priority. After marriage and kids, responsibility hits him. He takes time off from work to be with his family. Fathers like Atul make sure, “we go out on 2 vacations every year, even if it is a short trip or close by. We go out on Sundays, maybe for shopping. Right now going for a movie is a luxury because my kid is a little young. We don’t get to go for movies often. But, yeah, we go out for dinner. We organize dinner at home for my friends, too.”
For entertainment, people like Rohit Maheshwari, software engineer, “At the end of the day after dinner, watch TV and discuss the happenings of the day. Going for movies is a problem, since my baby, Gia, is still 1.5 year old. While in the weekends, normally we go to our friends’ place and have a get-together.”
This article was previously published in Eve’s Times magazine and it has been reproduced here with the permission of the editor, Swati Amar.